Hannibal Lecter

Tasty

Hannibal Lecter was notorious for enjoying some liver with a nice Chianti.  Well I don't think he would think mine was particularly tasty, full of tumours and potentially enlarged! Sigh....

For those who've not caught up, here is the latest vlog of me filling you in on what the oncologist has said....Entitled, 'Cancer = Non fun times'

https://youtu.be/329eQtXBVZE

So since then I have been put on steroids, painkillers and tablets to stop acid reflux (because of the steroids), they are to help with the bloating and pain I've had in my stomach which could potentially be due to an fluid surrounding my organs... great!!  The scan should hopefully give us some answers.

The downside of steroids is the insomnia it brings and the EATING....Grrrr....I am already eating far too much and not doing any exercise but this is taking (or eating) the biscuit.  That's why I try and avoid steroids wherever possible, but I have to admit they are helping alleviate some of my stomach discomfort.  But on the downside they are making me gain weight, a LOT!

Scanxiety

They managed to get an urgent CT scan booked in, so I had that on Thursday evening.  I should get the results in a week's time, so keep everything crossed for me.  Although, there is fuck all I can do about what the results are going to say, so I am going to try and enjoy the coming week as best as I can.

Ready to be scanned

Cannula, my favourite!  In first time though....phew

Eurostar faff

Tim has next week off and we had booked to go to Brussels and Bruges on the Eurostar (as I am unable to fly due to having my PICC line), but with everything that's been going on and potentially going on, I just haven't got the mental or physical capacity to deal with that sort of trip at the mo.

We emailed Virgin Trains and explained the situation - we'd bought Advance non-refundable tix but thought it was worth a punt to see if we could get our money back.  They were amazing, responded really quickly and refunded us. Ace.

But to Eurostar.  They sent back a perfectly pleasant email but it just stated the 'rules' back at us, ie. the tix were non-refundable but we could change the dates of the tickets for £40 each (they weren't even going to off us that for free!!  Jeez...I mean, in the circumstances, you think they'd offer something right??)

So I decided to take to Facebook. I wrote a perfectly pleasant but 'I am disappointed' message on their page.  Then a number of my friends got behind it (without me asking) and the next thing, one of my friends Dave had also Tweeted it out as well.  The power of social media eventually worked and after two days of 'haggling' and explaining how disappointed I was, particularly as Virgin had been so accommodating in the circumstances, Eurostar agreed to give us a refund, so at least that isn't money down the drain.

Bizarrely, when my oncologist said 'enjoy this 4/5 week treatment break' (hence why we booked the trip), in no way did I think it was actually going to be one of the worst periods of time I've had with secondary breast cancer so far.  The mental anguish of not knowing what's going on, what treatment I may have, or even if there is any treatment available now is an absolute head fuck, and I'm also still really fatigued.  Honestly, I think I felt better when I was on chemo, and that's saying something.

And to let you all know, then nail infection has now gone, but all of my nails are now separating from the nail bed and I'll have to be so careful not to pull any of them off... oh, the joys!!

Gross!

Ring the changes

In other news, I was so excited that Lisa Eldridge (my make up guru and friend), so, so kindly gave me one of her 'Kate' rings to mark the end of my chemotherapy treatment.  I had bought the 'Eva' ring (named after Eva Green) over the summer and mentioned to her at the time that I was planning on buying the Kate ring (named after Kate Winslet) when it was back in stock.  I then got a call from her assistant to say that Lisa wanted to gift it to me.  I am so, grateful, it is absolutely beautiful.

The Kate

Kate and Eva together

A lovely message from Lisa

Oh, and I've treated myself to a pair of Stella McCartney Stan Smith trainers....they are ridiculously expensive, but who cares....I totally live in jeans and trainers and have worn Stan Smiths for years...can't wait for them to arrive. 

Press

Susie and I have also been asked to be part of Breast Cancer Care's Breast Cancer Awareness month campaign with Accessorise who are launching a friendship bracelet with proceeds going to the charity.  We have been interviewed for a blog so keep your eyes peeled to Facebook's Breast Unit Events page as I'm sure we'll be sharing it on there.  Don't forget we're on Twitter too.

Breast Unit Events

Oh, and we may be announcing news of our final Snow Ball soon too.....(well, it will be the 'not so' Snow Ball as it will be in May next year, as we deferred it from it's usual December slot due to me going through chemo). EXCITING!!!


This blog post is dedicated to fellow Breast Cancer Care Show model Laura, who not only was diagnosed with breast cancer at 23, but earlier this year was diagnosed with a benign brain tumour and earlier this week, on her 28th birthday, was diagnosed with skin cancer.  I mean....what is that about?? Life is so, so sodding unfair to some of the most beautiful people.  Here's to you Laura (and thank you for my gift this week too, you are such a selfless and wonderful person). Big love sweetheart.

Until next time folks. xx

ps. I've not even had a shower yet and it's 4pm....don't you just love weekends!! hahahahahaha.