#TeamGirls

The date

So I am no longer a bingo virgin (another 'first at 40') and last night was spent with some of my fab choir buddies at the Gala bingo hall.  Crikey - it's a HUGE place and we kept getting 'shhh'd', we hadn't realised you had to be so quiet.  Not great when you are meeting for a good old natter and catch up!!

The saving grace was that I won two full houses, so my £7 investment, returned £80 in winnings. Boom.  Not bad for a night's work!

Poor Timmy is home today as he has got an absolute stinker of a cold and I've never heard him sneeze so much and so violently, and he never takes time off so he must be poorly.  I'm also feeling tired and down today.... My back is now really, really hurting...I still can't drive as it's too painful and I was generally feeling fed up. Dad has been my taxi even more than usual as he's been driving me to and from work.

Then, this morning I had a phone call from the CT department at Worcester Royal Hospital.  My biopsy is this Thursday (well, it's one way of getting out of audit which will be taking place at work!!!).  

It all sounds a lot more involved than we were expecting!!

When I had the biopsy for my initial breast cancer diagnosis, I was given an injection of local anaesthetic into my boob and then my consultant used an ultrasound and a long sort of staple gun with a needle on the end to take a sample of tissue in my boob .  It also sounded like a staple gun when it went off - it was really loud!!  

But for this one I was told that I will need to go to the 'day case' area at 8am and then the procedure has been booked in for 11am.   She asked if I'd had bloods done for 'clotting' (everyone's favourite word!!!), - jesus, what are they going to be doing to me??!!!!

I said I'd had bloods taken for lots of things, but wasn't sure if that was one.  She said she would check and ring me back.  I asked if she could call today to let me know as I don't work on Tuesdays so could go up to the hospital to get some done if needs be.

I told Tim.  My stomach started going over.  What if I have to have another general anaesthetic?  That will be four in 12 months and after the last one I nearly puked everywhere as I was so unbelievably anxious when I came round from my op! Non-fun times.

Tim asked if I needed to go 'nil by mouth'.  It wasn't even something I'd considered, so when the lady from the CT department called me back to say I would need to go and get bloods done at the hospital today, I asked.  She said, 'oh that's a good question, let me check'.  She did and then said, yes, I would need to be nil by mouth.  Crikey.  Thank goodness Tim had mentioned it as I probably would have tried to have some brekkie and a cuppa before heading off early doors to the hospital.

#TeamGirls

I told the girls that I needed to go for bloods today and as Susie needed some too so said she could take me up there after we met Jen for lunch.

I wasn't really feeling it at all when Suze came to pick me up.  I was down, tired, anxious.  We went to pick up Helen (as she's had to change her days this week and so now free today, yay) and we were off to the Countryside Centre to meet with Jen on her lunch break as she is working nearby.  It was nice to spend time with the girls,  I filled them in on the biopsy chat and apologised for not being myself today. Jen had to head back to work and then Susie drove H and I to the hospital.  

Now, I've spoken about blood tests before and my absolute love of them (NOT!!!), but most of the time, they are fine.  But today, for some reason, I had a feeling things weren't going to go well.  I also started to get really anxious beforehand.  

When I was called through, the nurse seemed to take ages finding my details on the system.  In the meantime, Susie was called through and seemed to be done and dusted pretty quickly.  He was prodding around at my vein for ages (I HATE that bit) and then went in - I flinched badly, which I don't normally and then he started prodding again, I closed my eyes and started deep breathing then he uttered the magic words 'it's not working, I'm going to have to try somewhere else'.  He took out the needle and that was it.  The flood gates absolutely opened.  I was practically inconsolable, the nurses must have wondered what on earth was wrong.

Susie came rushing over and held my hand and put her arms around my shoulders and I sobbed my heart out.  Another nurse wanted to then try for my bloods.  All I wanted to do was run away and shout 'no' but I knew I needed to do it before Thursday, so she had a go and Suze stayed with me, held my hand and helped me breathe through it.  The nurse dug it right in as my veins still weren't playing and when she was done, I just broke down and sobbed again.  To be fair, it's the first time I've cried, and it had to happen at some point.

Suze took me out into the corridor and H was looking after Lukey while Suze was looking after me.  'Do you both want to come for a brew and a biscuit at mine?' Suze said, 'yes please', we replied.  Nothing that a good old cuppa can't fix.  It's just what I needed and felt so much better afterwards. We are #TeamGirls. Lucas even decided to take some pics of us trying on funny glasses and he was quite adept at taking his own selfie too - he's only 3 and a half! 

Suze then drove us both home and I was having my hair cut and it was nice to be pampered.  I spoke to my lovely hairdresser Claire about it too.  Now I feel shattered, and am slightly worried I've got a bit of a sore throat coming on!!

So think of me on Thursday, I'll let you know how it goes!  GULP