The Biopsy

Toad in the hole or beef madras??

So the day of reckoning was Thurs 12 Jan.  I'd been asked to go to the medical day case unit at the Worcester Royal for 8am, nil by mouth, and my procedure was due at 11am.

Gords drove Juney and I up there before heading to the dentist.  Mum and dad were taking one for the team as Timmy still had a bad cold and it's not a good plan to take a stinker into the hospital.

It was dark when we arrived, and there was chat of snow.....

8am - we found the medical day case area.  Upon arrival I checked in, and the first thing I was told was that there was no bed for me!!!!!!! And it was possible that I might not have my procedure today!!!! Commence moaning about the fact I have incurable cancer.  Ouch.  I don't normally play that card, and I did apologise to the guy on reception and said I knew it wasn't his fault.... but I had already built myself up for the biopsy today.  I certainly didn't fancy the thought of hanging around for hours and then being sent home in the end without it taking place and then do the whole thing again the next day, or whenever they could get me in.

Mum and I had a bit of a moan to ourselves and mum text dad to say there was no point him coming down to the hospital after his dentist appointment as we weren't sure it was even going to happen.

The good old travel Scrabble came with us this time, as we were already prepared for a three hour wait (8am-11am) and thank goodness we took it.  The first game started....

My back was aching really badly but the chair I was in was, thankfully, quite comfortable. The waiting room was really small though and there was absolutely no privacy at all.  This doesn't bother me too much, but I know it would impact (Kev - affect, effect??) other people.

There was a poor woman in the corner with her head scarf on clearly going through chemo. The anesthetist came in to speak to her and, in front of us all, was explaining her procedure and what needed to happen.  All I wanted to do was hug this poor woman as she was on her own and started crying when they went into the detail.  You try not to listen, but, to be honest, it was difficult not too. She had a blood clot which they needed to disperse and also to administer her chemo drugs.  They were going to have to through her neck jugular vein. Jesus!  TMI!!!  Poor woman.

More people kept arriving for day case and mum was mumbling about 'why on earth are all these people being dealt with and not you?'.  To be fair, I would normally be the one moaning about that, but it's weird, when someone else does it, it forced me to look at it rationally and realise that their immediate needs must be greater than mine.  You just don't know what's going on with people.

Anyway, I suddenly had a horrible taste in my mouth and realised I hadn't cleaned my teeth in the morning....I was so busy shaving my armpits in case they needed to be exposed (what is it with me and armpit hair??) and because I hadn't had any breakfast, I just totally forgot to clean them and was then paranoid about having bad breath.  I told mum and we had a bit of a joke about it.  

The reception man came into the room and I said to mum I was going to ask him if we could go home and then be called back in if something became free (as we only live 10 mins from the hospital and I didn't fancy sitting there all day getting all stressed).  He went to ask but said we couldn't in case a bed became free quite quickly that I needed to be put in.

The second game of Scrabble had started at this point and people, including the nurses, were quite intrigued by our game and were giving us both hints!  One lady commended us on our good idea to bring it to pass the time!

It was starting to get a bit cold in the waiting room (there seemed to be a draft from somewhere) and mum was really cold.  She asked the auxillary (Phil) for a blanket and he thought it was for me, but when he arrived with it, mum put it over her legs....the look on his face, it was really funny - I said 'er, who is the patient here?' and told mum she should have brought her slippers with her too #granny. hahaha.

Next thing I know the ward sister is coming over to me with what I hoped was good news about a bed (it was about 10.15am at this point).  Sadly she simply said, they've asked for some more blood samples from you.  My face dropped and the colour must have drained from my face and I just said 'you're joking?' 

I explained that I'd had some on Tuesday and she said they were no good and they wanted fresh samples, oh, and while she was at it, she would put the cannula in!  WHAT!?! I might not even get seen today!!  Needless to say, in front of everyone, I just broke down in tears again and the sister said, 'I know this must be so stressful'.  Er, YES IT BLOODY WELL IS!! (obviously I didn't say that as I could barely get my breath from crying at this point).  Mum was holding my hand and trying to comfort me.  They even got me some water and she said I could have a few sips even though I was nil by mouth.  So, she jabbed me again and managed to get the cannula in, then took FOUR blood samples from me.

Eventually I calmed down and I told the nurse abuot my lack of teeth brushing and she managed to get me a toothbrush and toothpaste, ace. Mum and I resumed our Scrabble.

Off I go....

All of a sudden, just after 11am, the sister came over and said 'I'll get into trouble for this, but I've managed to get you a bed, got and put this gown on now, just take off your top half, and then come back and we'll wheel you for your procedure'. Er, what?? It all happened so fast, mum and I were flustering around trying to get our stuff sorted.  I went into the toilet and took my top and bra off (easier said than done when you've got a cannula and two tubes sticking out of the crook of your arm).  The sister had basically called in a 'bed' favour.

A different nurse asked me a few questions (such as 'what is your religion' er, christian I suppose, but actually more atheist if I'm honest....what sort of god would bring cancer into the world! I mean, really?!) and she took my blood pressure and obs.  Before I knew it I was sitting on a bed and being wheeled out by a porter waving bye to mum.

I felt like a right knob sat on this bed with my gown and jeans and biker boots on.  It was weird being wheeled in the bed as I'm used to simply roaming the hospital corridors.  You get people looking at you a very different way when you're on a bed.

We arrived at the CT area and Phil the auxillary was looking after me.  A few minutes after I got there I was wheeled into the CT room.  The radiographer asked me to get on the CT scanner bed. They had to help me get up and down as my back was so unbelievably painful and I was crying out with the pain. Sigh.

She said I would need a quick scan first before the consultant radiologist came in to perform the biopsy so she said she would just be on the other side of the window.  I lay there with my eyes closed waiting for it to happen for what seemed like a long time, then the radiographer came back in and said 'have you signed a consent form'?  Er, no.

She then said, we needed to wait for the consultant.  I was lay there chatting to her for half an hour before the consultant arrived.  We talked about all sorts (including the state of the traffic on the M42... rock and roll!).

The consultant radiographer came in and was lovely.  He said 'I need to explain the procedure and potential side effects'.  To be honest, ignorance is bliss as far as I'm concerned, but I totally understand they have to do that.

He then said that they were aiming to get a sample from the enlarged tissue around my sternum, but if that wasn't possible then they would need to take some from the bone which would require sedation and the possibility of a collapsed lung! jesus!!

This also meant that the rest of the procedure would be just under a local and he hadn't told me how he was going to do it at this stage.

Both radiographers were then trying to decide if it would be better if I put my gown on with the opening at the front so they had access to my chest or simply take my arm out of it.  I just blurted out, 'I'm happy to just take it off as I'm always getting my boobs out to be checked' - that was met with a silence and slightly odd look.  I can understand that but I'm honestly so used to whipping them out for checking, mammograms etc etc that it doesn't bother me at all.  They eventually decided on me just taking my arms out of the gown (although this really hurt as it put my back into a funny position) and my boobs were half showing anyway!

Right, so the first thing was a shot of tramadol painkiller into my leg (which went into the muscle as intended, but actually hurt).  I told them that I suffer from panic attacks and he asked 'how will I know?' and I said 'I will start shaking uncontrollably' - he said they would be able to sedate me if that started happening!

I asked the radiographer if I could hold her hand while the consultant did the procedure and she obliged.  It's funny how, even though I'm 40, I still need that comfort of having my hand held as if I was a small child, but believe me, it helps.

I lay there with my eyes closed.

They gave me a quick CT scan so they could see where they needed to 'aim for' with the biopsy, the machine makes a huge whirring sound, then they came back into the room and he drew a line on me in felt tip - he described everything before he did it.  I kept my eyes closed the whole time. He then said 'I now need to give you the local anaesthetic and it will sting when it goes in'.  That is an UNDERSTATEMENT, it really hurt when it went in and then it felt like the needle was pushing on my bone and it was nasty. I was so thankful I was holding the radiologist's hand. Then he said, I just need to leave the needle in while we do another scan to make sure it's in the right place.  WHAT? You're gonna leave this sticking in me?!  Yep.

I had another scan and then he took the needle out and had to press on the area and sort of distribute the local aneasthetic.  He then told me that the biopsy would sound like a staple gun which was the same as I had in my boob eight years ago and he demonstrated the noise so I would be ready for it.

He then said, 'I'm putting the needle in now and you feel some pressure on your chest' which I did and he asked me if it was painful, which, thankfully, it wasn't.  Then he told me he was going to take the biopsy - OMG - the noise went off and pushed onto my bone and surprised the hell out of me and THAT HURT - not as bad as if there no anaesthetic, but still pretty painful.  That happened twice and then he took it out to have a look.  He said it looked like he had a good sample and I was relieved, but then said, 'I would like to do it again'. Fun times.  So the whole thing happened again, and then he withdrew the biopsy needle  for a second time and said 'I just need to clean you up otherwise the nurses will tell me off, and I'll put a plaster on'.  I then asked 'do you have a plaster with a smiley face which says 'I've been a big, brave girl?'' - they both laughed and said 'no, but we could do with some of those' and then with all seriousness, he said, 'you have been very brave'.  Honestly, I felt I was about eight years old again at the dentist!  It made me laugh. 

I then opened my eyes (after it was all over) and they were both covered head to toe in lead lined outfits - they looked so heavy.

I thanked them both so much and was so grateful to them.  The consultant then said 'oh, can we just take a final slice?' WHAT??!!  OMG.... I said 'er, what do you mean 'slice'?' and he sort of laughed and said, 'oh, I mean just the top slice of your body for a CT scan...maybe I need to be careful of the words I use' - yep, that's for sure!!

I then had to get off the scanner and back onto the bed.  The back pain was so bad my legs nearly buckled from under me and I had to grab onto Phil.

I had to wait for a porter (Billy, who took me there in the first place - he was really sweet) to wheel me to a ward for obs, which the radiologist had said would have to be for FOUR HOURS!  Crikey, I was amazed, as it's been four hours when I've had a general before, but was surprised it was this long for a local.  I asked if I could have a cup of tea now and she said yes, so I was looking forward to that.  However, there was then confusion as to where I was going back to, so I ended up waiting in a corridor with Phil and Billy for 30 mins... Bless Billy, he knew I was really hungry and went onto one of the wards and grabbed three packets of biscuits for me and I wolfed down three custard creams in one go.  And relax!

Back on the ward

I ended up back on the day case ward, but I had to be screened off as the ward only had men on it and I was the only woman.  I got back to the ward just after 1pm.  Mum was wondering what had happened to me as I'd been nearly two hours.  I told her the story and although the procedure had only taken about 20-25 mins, there was just lots of hanging around.

The nurse did my obs every 15 mins for the first hour and said I could take sips of water and have some food in an hour's time.  Oops, I don't think I was meant to have those custard creams!!

My blood pressure was low (95/65) so they had to keep an eye on it.  I had a headache and was allowed some paracetamol and was then able to take my anti-depressant too!!

Phil then came in and said I had a choice of food, either toad in the hole or beef madras with rice and naan.  Crikey, an NHS curry - what was this going to be like??

To be fair, it was bloody great and I wolfed it down while listening to a man on the opposite side of the ward having some fluid drained from his lungs!! Told you there wasn't much privacy.

I was very grateful of my screen around me when I needed the loo and was told that I couldn't get up and go to the toilet but would have to use a bed pan.  Oh dear.  First time using one of those.  What a palava - I won't go into details, but it was all a bit awkward and VERY weird.  I was already looking forward to getting back home to one of my own toilets! hahahaha.

I had said to mum earlier that she didn't need to wait for the four hours as I would just be lay there, however, she said, 'I'm happy to wait if you want', and I looked at her, and said, 'it would be great if you could'.  Just knowing she was there, even though I lay there with my eyes closed and relaxed and she was reading a magazine helped me massively.  We also had a heart to heart about things and she asked me if I was expecting the news when I received it - in all honesty, I wasn't.  I knew something wasn't right with my chest, but to be told the 'incurable news', was just a total shock.

Then at 5pm I had my final obs checks including one when I stood up (and my pulse read 113 so she took it manually instead and it was 89), she took out the cannula and we were able to go home.

It seemed odd walking down the corridors after being wheeled around and knowing so much had gone on that day, but daddy was there to pick us up and it was dark when we left.

It was great to get home into the arms of Timmy for even more, but this time home-made, curry (yum).

Home, and breathe.  I survived.

My follow up oncologist appointment is on Monday 23 Jan....  Until next time. xx